Seems Kinda Trite

I ruin the ending of the movie Mystery Alaska in this post, so if you care, don't bother reading.

There are random movies in all of the cabins and lots of them I haven't seen. Last night I watched Mystery Alaska. How fitting, right? I don't know why I even bother to watch sports movies. They're all basically the same. They said it best in Wet, Hot, American Summer in a scene where the coach is giving the team a pump up speech before the other team arrives:

"EVERYBODY KNOWS TODAY IS THE CULMINATING, CLIMACTIC GAME AGAINST EVIL CAMP TIGERCLAW. WE'VE PUT TOGETHER AN UNLIKELY TEAM OF MISFITS, AND WE'VE BEEN TRAINING LIKE CRAZY ALL SUMMER. YES, WE'VE PUT TOGETHER A MOTLEY CREW YOU'D NEVER THINK WOULD BE ABLE TO WIN A SINGLE GAME. WE HAD A KOOKY TRAINING PERIOD WHERE IT SEEMED LIKE, WELL IT SEEMED LIKE NOTHING WAS GOING TO GO RIGHT, BUT GUYS, SOMEHOW WE MADE IT TO THE FINALS. SO I SAY, WHEN THOSE ANONYMOUSLY EVIL CAMPERS FROM TIGERCLAW GET HERE, WE GIVE IT OUR BEST SHOT, THEN WE TRY TO COME FROM BEHIND AT THE LAST MINUTE WITH SOME WEIRD TRICK PLAY THAT WE'VE MADE UP, AND WE WIN THE GAME! WHAT DO YOU SAY, TEAM?"

After he gives the speech the campers are silent and ones says, "It sounds like pretty well worn territory," and another agrees it, "seems kinda trite." When the bus of camp tigerclaw arrives seconds later the coach runs out to them and because they're far away you can't hear what he's saying to the other coach when he gets to the bus, but you can distinctly hear one word: Trite. Camp tigerclaw's coach agrees so he gets back on the bus and they leave and the game is off. Wet, Hot, American Summer is such a funny movie.

That said, Mystery Alaska was slightly better than the usual. One thing that wasn't cliche about this movie was that the home team underdogs lost. I liked it in that respect because I'm sick of seeing the same exact story applied to different sports and characters. Other than that it was just like all of the other comeback sports movies. Any movie where Burt Reynolds starts the slow clap automatically gets a star taken away. They should make an originality scale for movies where they take away a certain number of points every time they do something that's been done a million times before. Slow clap: minus 5 points. Burt Reynolds doing the slow clap: minus 10 points. Last minute comeback: minus 5 points. Best player gets injured and a fill in with hopes and dreams replaces him: minus 5 points. Depressed locker room before final period/inning/half that gets pumped up by the key player: minus 5 points. The game somehow mends a broken father/son relationship: minus 5 points. So the movies with the lowest scores are the most cliche. Really, we should be warned about this stuff ahead of time.